Blogging Vs Writing a page of Diary

Yes, I always wanted to write something on this. People have always asked me why i never maintain a blog. And those who know the fact that i am in the habit of Diary entrying on a daily basis, ask this with even a greater degree of gravity. So, this blog (Ironically !!) is my answer to all of them. The first difference being the difference in the train of thoughts that comes in one's mind, while writing a blog as compared to those while writing a diary entry. Its like u always have to be politically correct. You have to write under the pressure of being read, and that makes you use the backspace key again and again. Now thats neither free writing, nor free expression, is it ??

And then, You can't write any personal comments on people and characters of your life. You can't write about the people you hate, the people you loathe, the people you envy, and stuff like that. Yes, some of you might think that you can, but i wanna say only one thing,

"Try that, and don't tell me afterwards that i hadn't warned. "

The society is not as flat as the 17" Samsung LCD screen on which i am writing these words, and people tend to misinterpret words easily. So, the only things you are left with to write upon are censored reviews of everyday thoughts, feelings on what's happening round the globe, and silver memories of the golden old days.....

But its not like that in case of writing a diary entry. You take a pen ,ur diary, and forget what the world thinks about you or what it expects out of you. In fact, i have best analyzed myself while writing the diary entries, and in a way, it has helped me to understand myself... The diary entries are pretty lively ones, with your friends, your crushes, and your uncensored thoughts on whatever is going on in your life. I write what i like, and what i don't like and not bcoz' i want to make other ppl feel that i like or dislike them, but to tell myself about my tastes....

Writing a page of diary is like standing in front of a mirror, and talking to urself, widout the fear of being overheard coz' the only potential reader is your roomie, who already knows much about you. No Intensional spelling mistakes in the F-word ( btw, Using an acronym is yet another form of censorship !!), no use of the characters like * or # or $ in the words at strategic points, no WTF's......... Every thing is as straight as it can be.

Yes, blogging has got its own advantage. It gives you readers for your writings. It provides you a platform to show people that you can write, and you can write well, but i don't think it makes any difference because they don't get the actual share of what you think about them and the world, but a censored version of it. Infact I myself started to maintain a blog because many people didn't think i could write on issues that surround me. WTF !!!

Happy after such a long time.

Life has been pretty much harsh on me these days, especially since the last few months. Not talking with my crush was way better than having forced to ignore her, which, unfortunately, i'm onto these days...... And i know its all my mistake. She was never mine, nor would she be in future, but something inside me still remains attracted to her, though her public declaration of not liking me anymore has given me a lot of pain and anger...

Anyways, as i said, i m happy after a long long time. Reasons ? I went to the swimming pool today. Yes, i know, so dumb of me to be happy for such a lil reason. But hey, this was the first time i ever put myself inside a swimming pool (leave aside the tales of rivers or ponds, but experiences are in dearth there too ! ) The blue base of the Swimming Pool shone bright beneath the clear water, and i, in my black trunks, pink swim-goggles and red rubber cap ( Imagine how trendy i wud have been looking !!),was right there in the middle, ready to teach myself how to swim. Had it not been Praddy, i would definitely have passed my entire slot standing in water. But he was over-enthusiastic to teach me the basic moves.
The white flood lights shone on my back, while i struggled hard kicking back the water, being the only person sporting the pink goggles in the entire pool. Swimming may be fun, but learning how to swim is definitely not. You get easily exhausted by kicking back the water, and its kind of frustrating to see other people swim past you while you just practising how to keep your body afloat in the water or how to exhale in water ( no inhale in water, buddy, else be ready to gulp enough water to choke yourself out !!).

But all this exercising and practising was worth it, and i started sort of loving to keep my head inside water and kick hard. Each time i started feeling breathless, i thought of her and the last few days...... how she told she didn't want to be wid me anymore, and how i sent her two offensive-words packed e-mails, saying that i didn't care for her anymore. This whole thing gave me a kind of frustration, and i started to kick the water even more, like wanting to come out of the circumstances i was coping with.....
And then, when i raised my head outside the water, and removed my googles, I saw heavy rains, pouring more water in the already overflowing water pool. Now tht was what i call a scene of a lifetime. The large Swimming pool, with clear water shining over the light blue floor, the luminence throwing mast lights, the heavy rains trying to wet what was already wet, and the dark, thunderous clouds, on the background of the strangely silent, pitch black sky.

They say, Rome was not built in a day, and similarily, swimming can't be learnt in a single day (or evening, rather). Still, praddy says i would be learning how to swim in less than a week. Let's hope so.By the way, one thing is clear, its much fun ,and a different experience altogether.

Why am i happy? Coz' today i got a reason to live again. Since the last few days, i was carrying on my mundane IIT life, and the relationship disaster was eating my head up. Getting the aim to learn swimming has come as a change, and would surely help to get back my lost efficiency and confidence. I am planning to learn guitar, too, but it would be rather early to say anything about that plan right now.

All in all, i am literally doing many things to get myself engaged in something or the other, for i know i think a lot, and thinking all day with no work at hand is like counting the days remaining in your life, and regretting of having wasted it all. I dread an unemployed myself, i really do !!